Battle of the Bands! MTV’s 2ge+her

This is our final installment in our Battle of the Bands: a collection of essays about our favorite fictional bands to tie in with our latest Zine.

If there were to be a battle of the bands featuring the best fictional bands across entertainment, of course you’d expect to see the likes of the Wyld Stallyns, School of Rock, or Spinal Tap. But what if I told you that by redefining your idea of what a band is, I could introduce you to one of the best fake bands of all time? Meet the boy band 2ge+her.

Now, I can hear the protests already: “But boy bands aren’t real bands!” I’m here to combat that point of view with this well-researched and succinct counterargument: Yeah, they are. They’re groups of people who produce music as a form of entertainment for their audience. That’s a band. Their instruments just happen to be their voices and bodies instead of drum sets and guitars. Boy bands are most definitely bands, and they’re my passion. As a girl who grew up in the ‘90s, I consider myself a kind of expert on the subject. I promise that the heart, wit, and genuine musical talent of 2ge+her can rival any other fictional bands that might enter the battle. 

When MTV introduced 2ge+her in February 2000, the world was at the height of its boy band craze, with girls going to war for their favorites (team NSYNC 4evr). It was the perfect and perhaps only moment in time that a boy band parody could not only poke fun at the groups we loved but also steal some of the spotlight and success as their own, which is exactly what 2ge+her did. In one year, their first movie went on to spawn an album, a TV series, a second album that reached number 15 on the Billboard charts, and a slot opening for Britney Spears on several of her tour stops that summer. Not bad for a band that’s not technically real.

Like many great fictional bands, 2ge+her is the underdog of their story when we first meet them in their self-titled feature film. Jerry (Evan Farmer), Chad (Noah Bastian), Doug (Kevin Farley), Mickey (Alex Solowitz), and Q.T. (Michael Cuccione) are discovered — on street corners, skate parks, karaoke bars, and even a male teen beauty contest — by Bob Buss (Alan Blumenfeld), the down-and-out former talent manager of the reigning (fictional) kings of teen girls’ hearts, Whoa. Bob assembles 2ge+her all in the hopes of usurping the boy band he helped put together. For the next 90 minutes, we’re witness to the creation of a boy band: learning about the five archetypes crucial to each boy band’s success (the heartthrob, the shy one, the reassuring older brother type, the rebel, and the cute one), watching as the boys master how to navigate interviews (everyone MUST have a different favorite color or risk their impressionable fans feeling left out), and cringing through the group’s first trainwreck of a performance at a small-town spelling bee. 

But in the end, 2ge+her gets it, well, together. They forgo the gimmicks and costumes and take the stage as themselves, winning over the crowd with the best math song ever to exist, “U + Me = Us (Calculus),” and exposing Whoa for the (SPOILER ALERT) no-talent, lip-syncing scum that they are. The movie ends on a high, and our new favorite boy band dances off into the sunset and the many real-life opportunities I mentioned earlier!

However, 2ge+her’s success was cut tragically short. In January 2001, less than a year after their introduction, Michael Cuccione, the actor responsible for the portrayal of the perpetually horny “cute one,” Q.T., passed away at the age of 16 from respiratory failure due to pneumonia. Q.T. was my favorite when I was 11. I thought he was the cutest (obviously), he was funny, and his parts were arguably the best on most of the songs. Cuccione’s death devastated not only me but the entire fandom at the time, and there was just no way for the band to continue, either fictionally or in the real world, without one of their own. By March 2001, 2ge+her had disbanded permanently. 

It’s pretty obvious that 2ge+her has left a lasting impression on me. Not only were they vocally great for a fake band, but their songs were catchy, funny, and a little bit raunchy. 2ge+her taught me the enjoyment of parody and satire at a young age and that it’s okay to poke fun at the things you love in a non-malicious way. Unfortunately, the movie and the first album aren’t currently available to stream, but if you still need convincing that 2ge+ther is worthy of the best fictional band title, you can check out their second album, 2GE+HER Again, on Spotify!