“Omissions are betrayals” – Barbra Cambell-Done (played by Holly Hunter in Little Black Book)
To be blunt, being cheated on, manipulated, or just flat-out deceived in a relationship sucks. It’s not a fun place to find yourself in. One day, you are planning to marry someone you love. Somebody who you thought would be “your forever.” The next day, you learn that your significant other is seeking attention from someone else. Not only that, but you found out about it by coming across inappropriate text messages on your person’s cellphone. Unfortunately, this has happened to me. I know I’m not alone. It’s a story many people are familiar with, where their dreams of a happily ever after are cut short. In hindsight, you realize finding out the truth, as ugly as it is, eventually does set you free since deep down you probably knew all along that the person you thought was going to be your forever is not your forever person. Ironically, it’s also similar to the plotline of the romantic comedy film Little Black Book (2004). Late actress Brittany Murphy plays Stacy Holt, a vibrant young woman who begins a career in broadcast journalism and is in a long-term relationship with Derek (played by Ron Livingston), who at first appears to be a great boyfriend. However, he tells her that he isn’t open to talking about his past relationships and doesn’t like to bring girls home to meet his folks. This triggers Stacy’s insecurities and sends her down a rabbit hole to discover the truth. By using her journalistic skills incredibly irresponsibly, she interviews his exes under the assumption they are being interviewed to appear on television and finds out more than what she would like to know. Upon its release, the film received negative reviews due to its poor script and how problematic Stacy Holt is, despite Brittnay Murphy delivering a good performance. However, I feel the film does have a point or two regarding deception around relationships. And with social media being a major factor in our world today, I find the film has more in common with modern audiences. By depicting that there’s a fine line between secrecy and privacy, that insecurities can damage relationships, especially with today’s obsession with social media, and how reality TV manipulates its audiences through pain and turmoil, Little Black Book is a romantic comedy that is more relevant today.
Director Nick Hurran emphasizes how there is a thin line between secrecy and privacy in relationships. Secrecy is when you are withholding information that you know can cause harm and will come with consequences. Meanwhile, privacy is deciding to keep something to yourself for the sake of protection. Hurran’s film makes the audience see how these two concepts blur together. Derek and Stacy are both the central focus of this conflict. Derek’s actions ignite Stacy’s speculation of Derek’s past and who he’s been with. For example, in the scene where Stacy is studying old footage of the Kippie Kann Live, which includes an interview featuring a supermodel named Lulu Fritz, Derek reveals he and Lulu used to date but is reluctant to answer Stacy’s questions. “You don’t care to explain further?” Stacy says. Derek, feeling frustrated, immediately tries to end the conversation by telling her he and Lulu had “problems in bed” just to get her to stop worrying. This moment in the film is alarming for two reasons. One, Stacy appears very naïve and wants to give Derek the benefit of the doubt. Two, a major red flag in their relationship begins this search for the truth within Stacy.
It’s not until Stacy, under the advice of her coworkers Ira and Barb, decides to interview Lulu for the Kippy Kan Live Show under false pretenses that she learns that what Derek told her wasn’t true. He and Lulu had a great sexual relationship when he was on break from his ex, Joyce. Derek’s omission of truth is an example of how secrecy and privacy can get very murky. Though Derek has every right not to talk about his past relationships, Stacy doesn’t know his motives as to why. And especially after finding out the truth about the supermodel, it is easier for Stacy to assume he is lying about his past. Another example is when Stacy interviews Derek’s ex, famed gynecologist Rachel Keyes. Stacy learns that she and Derek had a picnic lunch and that she still shares custody of their dog. These are all details that Derek never shared, which makes him look shady in Stacy’s eyes. When the film explores this theme of secrecy and privacy, we begin to see how messy it can get when a person omits the truth. For example, Stacy tells Barb and Ira that she has never met Derek’s parents because he says “he never brings girls home.” Barb gets Stacy to dig through the Palmpilot again to find pictures of Derek and his ex Joyce on vacation with his parents. It is during this scene Barb whispers the film’s famous one-liner “Omissions are betrayals.”
Despite Stacy’s reckless actions, the film presents a good argument regarding omitting truths and how that creates miscommunication. Stacy is left with more questions than answers. She is confronted with the fact that Derek has not been honest with her upfront. The audience can see that she wants to believe that Derek is faithful to her and that she isn’t being strung along. However, due to his omissions, and her refusal to stop violating her journalistic integrity, Stacy can’t help but want to find out what Derek is not saying on a deeper level because she has no clarity on where they stand as a couple. The film is showing us that not speaking the whole truth, even if it hurts, can create more speculation and more pain down the line. The audience sees this unfold. For instance, when Stacy crosses the line even further by showing Joyce the pre-interview tape she did with Lulu. In it, Lulu reveals that Derek only went back to Joyce “out of pity.” Joyce, who still maintains a close friendship with her ex, was under the impression that the two could end up back together in the future due to the boomerangs they both share as a representation of their bond. Stacy didn’t know about the promise those two shared. Stacy shows her the tape and it destroys their bond, probably indefinitely. It’s a poignant moment for Stacy because she realizes that she crossed a line and learns that some things are meant to be kept secret. The film tries to answer its own question about whether or not omitting details is the same as lying because the line between secrecy and privacy is so fine. The movie ultimately shows it all comes down to the person’s intent and if there’s a consequence. In this film, there is. Derek is a man who refuses to talk about his past because he is still attached to it. Stacy couldn’t understand why. She feels like she has no choice but to take other people’s words as truth. In the end, she is forced to come to terms that she and Derek were not meant to be because he was still holding on to his past, specifically Joyce.
Another reason why Little Black Book is relevant is that it highlights how a person’s insecurities, if not managed, can sabotage relationships. Especially if technology is involved. Back in 2004, when the film was released, there were only social media channels like Myspace and Youtube. Moreover, cell phones transitioned from the famous Nokia brick phones to Kyocera flip phones, Blackberry, and the palm pilot. Therefore, the movie utilizes technology to emphasize that as tech gets more advanced, it is easier for people to hide their secrets on their phones or tablets. Hence, making the palm pilot be the perfect vehicle for Stacy to play with as she lets her insecurities get the best of her.
There is a reason why Stacy is so insecure and it has nothing to do with her looks. At the beginning of the film, Stacy is taught by her mom to believe that “luck is when preparation meets opportunity.” This influences her to make sure she is confident of her life choices. Unfortunately, she lets this belief control her life to the point it affects her relationships. For example, she breaks up with her former boyfriend Bean at their college graduation. He tells her, “what if you’re wrong? What if you just made the biggest mistake of your life?” In the next scene, she is running after Bean to try to get him back. From there, we see Stacy wanting to believe she is making the right choices when deep down she fears being on the wrong path in life. That is what makes her so relatable because everyone has insecurity in some shape or form. However, the problem with Stacy is that her insecurity of wanting to be so sure of herself has led to her always wanting to control situations in her life to the point she risks losing her relationships. She lacks a true sense of self and a moral code, which causes her to act out of integrity in this movie.
In addition, her insecurities allow her to let other people tell her what to do, such as digging deeper into Derek’s past more than necessary, creating more chaos in her life and career. For example, Barb uses phrases such as “check under the hood before purchasing the car” as Stacy schedules a fake interview with Rachel. Little phrases like these poke at Stacy, pressuring and fueling her to lure in Derek’s exes by lies and manipulation in search of the truth of her boyfriend’s past. Here, Barb is referencing the palm pilot, which Stacy can’t seem to let go of. It’s become Stacy’s “Pandora’s box,” and, as she says in the film, she “is Pandora.” She obsesses with learning the truth. For a while, she believes this palm pilot and her journalism skills will solve issues in her relationships until it hurts her in the end.
The moment when Joyce discovers why Derek came back is another example of how Stacy lets her insecurities push things way too far. It’s one thing to go through your significant other’s phone, but it’s another to go out and sever your boyfriend’s relationship with their exes even if you don’t approve. Though initially, her actions meant no harm, Stacy gets so caught up in her desperation for clarity that she ends up ruining her relationships with both Joyce and Derek, creating a deeper rift between these exes. The film does point out a harsh lesson here. Yes, it’s okay to have insecurities, but it’s only a problem if you let them dictate your actions and hurt people in the process. In the end, Stacy realizes that her insecurities are rooted in fear of letting go and not trusting herself. Not just in terms of relationships but also in trusting life and where it wants to take her. For instance, after quitting her producing job and breaking up with Derek, she runs into her old college beau Bean, who now owns her coffee shop. She naively thinks this meeting is a sign they are supposed to be together, only to get shot down when she sees Bean’s pregnant wife. He encourages her to keep moving forward and trust the process, quoting John Lennon, “Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans.” Despite Stacy’s fears of life’s uncertainty getting the best of her in the worst way possible, the film does show that there is still a chance of redemption. Director Nick Hurran shows the audience it’s possible to move on, change, and evolve no matter how far you hit rock bottom because the past can’t be undone. Not only is Stacy’s insecurities relatable, but also this notion of using technology to snoop on our significant others.
Smartphones really are a treasure cove of secrets if you allow them to be. Now that we live in an era where social media platforms like Instagram, Facebook, and Twitter dominate, it’s become easier to feel insecure in your relationships because there are more ways how someone can hide their secrets. Or at the very least, cover up their true intentions. These days people act out of insecurity and constantly snoop on their love interest’s social media profiles whether it’s in the relationship or after a breakup. At the same time, social media makes it difficult to contain a lie, because everyone’s activity is out on the internet (regardless if your profile is private). Even if you don’t go searching through it yourself, someone else has already seen it and can easily DM you with the truth, unannounced. Overall, though Little Black Book reveals how easy it is to lie behind a cellphone, the film is highly relatable now that social media has become a dominant way to relate and communicate with people. Again, the line between privacy and secrecy is a thin one. Acting out of insecurity will always come back to bite you, even if you do uncover an awful truth. In this case, Stacy learns the hard way that her boyfriend was stringing her along. However, she could’ve avoided more pain to herself and others had she stopped letting her insecurities drive her further down this path of wanting 100% certainty in life.
Lastly, Little Black Book is relevant today due to its depiction of reality tv and how it manipulates audiences by using people’s pain and trauma to gain ratings. Though Stacy’s intentions were just to figure out Derek’s past, Barb manipulates her throughout the film. It appears harmless at first as she persuades Stacy to keep digging and gathering info, whether that be setting up interviews for Derek’s exes or validating Stacy’s concerns about the situation so she can continue to find what she’s looking for. However, the film takes a sudden turn when it is revealed that Stacy Holt’s investigation is presented live on the Kippie Kann Show, all thanks to Barb, who uses Stacy’s problem to her advantage. This upsets Ira, whose “Little Black Book” episode pitch was the inspiration behind Stacy’s investigation. He confronts her. Barb calls him a hypocrite for his role in this whole ordeal and tells him, “this is reality!” The film uses Barb’s character to show that there will always be people who want to get ahead and are willing to do whatever it takes. In this scenario, ratings are down for the show. Barb, a longtime producer at Kippie Kann Live, knows what will make audiences of the reality tv show happy. From Barb’s perspective, Stacy’s relationship issues were the perfect bait for boosting ratings and helping Stacy get back control of her life, telling her “you got what you wanted Stacy. Your life back.”
Barb’s actions are a prime example of how reality tv works. Kippy Kann Live is similar to that of “Jerry Springer Show” or “Maury.” They feature guests fighting with their significant others over infidelity or figuring out who the father is. Kippy Kann Live is sort of a parody of those shows, emphasizing the use of drama to entice viewers. Drama and sex sell in the media. It brings in money and fame, for better or for worse. As consumers, we buy into it! Most of us have watched reality tv shows and get hooked by the chaos we see on there. Sadly, it’s Stacy’s own drama that is enough to help boost ratings. What happens to her at the end of the film is no different from what we see on reality tv today. Audiences get drawn into the drama for many reasons, but primarily because it’s exciting. There is passion, anger, sadness. These are all emotions we feel from time to time. It’s hard not to watch. This is why Barb telling Ira, “this is reality” strikes a nerve with him. He doesn’t like what is happening to Stacy and hates the fact he was an active participant, despite not knowing what Barb was going to do in the end.
Moreover, Little Black Book brings empathy into the picture at the last minute when Stacy admits to this whole scandal, confronting Derek about every piece of information she discovered and slowly coming to that painful realization that Derek and Joyce share a special bond, one that Stacy doesn’t have with Derek because, as he says, Joyce, “is different” from all the girls he’s been with. We see the pain in Joyce and Stacy’s eyes. The studio audience goes from being rowdy to sympathizing with her. When Stacy speaks to Derek, her voice cracks as tears flow down her face when she realizes that she and Derek are not meant for each other before quitting the show, who threatens to sue her if she leaves. The thing about reality tv is that it can reflect our reality to an extent. Anyone can be in Stacy’s shoes, minus the studio headlights and a live camera crew. Though Stacy’s actions crossed many lines and caused a lot of pain, this climax is a moment in the film that shows how unproductive, disruptive, and potentially harmful reality tv is to those who choose to participate in it. Reality tv relies on pain, traumas, and heartbreak to get audiences to gawk at someone else’s suffering all for the sake of fame, money, and ratings. We tune in and it becomes a vicious cycle until the show is over.
Overall, Little Black Book is a romantic comedy about betrayal in relationships. Though I never imagined finding myself in a similar painful (but thankfully, less messy) situation in my previous relationship, I realized this film has substance if you see past its script imperfections and its problematic lead character. Despite the harsh criticism it received in 2004, the contents of the film ring more true today because of how vast technology, specifically social media, has gotten in the last 20 years. Its reality tv sub-plot reflects how much our world revels in drama and mess over compassion and empathy. It is a relatable story about an insecure woman trying to find herself in this world while navigating a relationship with a man who may not have wanted to commit to her all along. Little Black Book is an underappreciated, unique, quirky film that shines a mirror on our modern world.
